Date: Autumn of my twenty-second year of life.

Location: Hellifyno

Tavern here is amazing!  So many different cultures of races, and people in here, feels really homely. Though I wish the alcohol would work better to stop the thoughts of everyone entering my mind...  The voices are overwhelming most of the time, I still need to get a handle on my power.

I need to practice with my scepter and learn how to protect myself again.  I've been away in myself for far…

Oh how to describe the feeling.

The Falling.

That moment when you miss a step coming down the stairs.

The feeling of gut-wrenching fear.

The thought of the ground meeting painfully against you...

That is only half of it.

Add it to the feeling...…

Wax paper melting

Covered in powered sugar

Drifting in the wind

Burning under the sun

Many vibrant colors

Symmetry and Beauty

A revered spectacle

Living off of sweetness

The paper lives and breaths

As it flutters through clouds

A beacon in your garden

Yet a small dot in the sky

Written by Dominique Laufeyson

When days seem too long, and nights too short,
When the rain pours down, and seems to flood the earth,
When the wolves howls sound like mornful cries of lose,
when all seems hopeless,
when the fear of being alone seems unbarriable,
When I wish I could just lay down, and die,
I turn my mind to one thought, and one thought alone that keeps me going.
I turn my thoughts to him.  

Being torn apart

Literally

Sinew and flesh

Stripped from bone and muscle…

Blood flowing, gushing, running,

Mind blanking, darkening, stopping

Heart pumping faster, faster, harder, racing,

Not stopping,

Darcy takes over

Changing

Manipulating my magic

Helping me into a frozen state

Changing

Helping

Parasite helping host

Dormant becoming…

I can fuck you up if you let me.

twist your world around pleasure

bring you satisfaction

                               gratification

                                                humilitaion

                                                                hardly ever reconciliation.

Want me?

Ask.

      or just take...

I'm the giver of lust

           bringer of…

Insanity taking hold

Motivation gone

Drive vanishing

Ridiculous behavior

Hysterical thoughts

Hating life

Breaking down

Collapsing into darkness

Consuming my motivation, drive

Everything that was left

Flames flicker

Flare

Emerge from the darkness

Seemingly out of nowhere

Hope brightens

Twisted darkness turns into twisted magic

Magic that heals

Magic that…

Manipulating

Using

Lying

Averting

Changing

Moody

Controlling.

You’re not getting in my head.

You know too much already.

I won’t be controlled.

GET OUT

SHAPE UP

START OVER

No…

You don’t understand…

I’m not here to be toyed with,

I’m here to make things

Beautiful things

Something you obviously don’t understand

My rock is…

Sensory overload.

Thoughts jumbling,

Colliding,

Coming to a standstill.

Eyes vacant,

Lightning fleetingly at useless things

Dangerous danger lurking in darkness

Darkness feeding on numbness,

Spreading it to encompass

Every

Last living

hope.

Until it's vanquished.

A beating within resonates,

An army ten thousand strong

Comes from deep within,

Hope slowly sprouts,

Growing…

Longing fills every fiber of my being

Waiting,

Somewhat impatiently,

When struck wrong

Chords clash

Emotions collide

Clanging

Disharmony

Is found everywhere

Everything seems hopeless

The longing grows painful,

Destructive,

Wraps it’s dark hand around everything in sight

Closing around light

Squelching it,

Drowning it

Collapsing the world around her.

Taking…

Rest in peace,

Unknown friend,

Who’s brother loved,

Until the very end,

Though in your shadow,

He always was,

He never stopped

His brother’s love.

Together

Forever,

Through thick and thin,

A brothers bond,

Will never wane,

Though it hurts greatly,

You’ll always find comfort,

In the memories kept within.

Spread the life of the loved one lost,

And…

Got a problem?

Come here sweetheart....

Tell Mistress Meg ALLLLLL about it.

Let me help you...

FORGET.about it...

I'll get you through it...

help you see to it...

that your problem gets a solution,

and we get lost in confusion.

While we weave a tangled web

and you...

use me,

abuse me,

let me give you what you want,

need,

to be your greatest.fucking,fantasy.

You…

Why is there so much hurt?

…sorrow?

Why do we create it for ourselves?

Why must we need to feel,

even, just…horrible?

To feel…

Why do we fail?

Why do we set ourselves up to fail?

Why can’t we be happy?

We’re always reaching,

                                              searching,

                                                                   wanting,

thinking we need the…

Structure invaded

Presence everywhere

On everything

Too much

Can’t pull away

Too ingrained

Too familiar

….Too hard.

But…

Was it really an invasion?

Was it unwanted?

Or welcomed with open arms…?

You see…

..I started it…

He went along with it

We’re BOTH trapped now…

We can’t escape it.

Neither can YOU!

All of our lives are connected..

Intertwined…

isn’t…

You see people suffering,

but don’t act upon it?

Don’t ask if they’re alright,

or what they might have

planned for the night…

Yeah, I know, you’re busy.

You have your own stress,

schoolwork etc.

I know that

it works both ways.

But, I hear your problems…

and then,

there doesn’t seem enough to share my own.

So,

they get worse

and…

I get you hooked.

Manipulative bitch.

I’ll take you and break you,

Any way you want.

Anytime.

Anywhere.

I’ll grab your hair,

Bite your throat,

Suck on your tongue,

 And make you choke.

Leave you wanting,

Always,

More.

When I’m done,

You’ll be begging for mercy,

Crying out my name,

Whimpering…oh, so,…

Emotions

raw

swirling

crowding mindspace

concentrating on life is difficult

Fantasy wants to rule

Life is calling me back as well

WAR HAS BEEN DECLARED!

    Emotionally

    Physically

    Spiritually

                         nothing be safe here in those familiar yet

                         unknown waters

                         tumultuous waters

                         ever changing, yet…

Pen poised above the skin,

Draws deeply into it,

Red later appears,

Like magic,

It flows among the lines,

That the golden nib has made,

It rushes along the canals,

The skin turning beautiful,

Into a work of art,

Soon the pen goes too deep,

The red overflows,

Blurs together,

Runs down the skin,

Leaving the artist to suffer.